After more than two years of complete silence I have finally decided to pick the pen up and write again. A lot has changed since I last posted. My life has changed drastically, so has my overall perception of it. Before writing this one I decided to read my last post (http://www.ubuntu-humanity.blogspot.com/2012/10/freedom.html ), and I was amazed by what two years can do for you, it can change you completely.
When I started blogging I was madly in love with my girlfriend of that time, until she fell pregnant with some other guy’s child and I learned that things are not always as they seem. The most important lesson I learned from that was that you can never control everyone and everything, disappointments are bound to occur along the way and the best thing you can do is to rise above them.
In the beginning of 2013 my parents separated. When something like that happens it changes everything, your perspective on love (even life as a whole), God’s method of doing things amongst other things, but in the end you learn to make peace with it, and accept that everything happens for a reason. Truth be told, it had been over between my parents way long before the separation. With that said I’d like to take my hat off for both of them for finally taking the bold step of separating officially, and not because they now hate each other but because they finally understood that they both deserve better. And as simple as I may say it now, at the time of its occurrence it was very appalling. You look at your mother and feel scared, not because you doubt her independence but because you wonder if the world still has room for her as a single woman in her early forties. And you also resent your father a bit, question if he ever loved your mother at all for you feel he has given up on her very quickly. And as he walks out the door you get very torn, because you feel that not only has he given up on her, but he has also given up on his own children too. But eventually you get to understand, although sometimes it is to finally understand that you will never understand.
With two years being such a long time I’d like to say that since then I’ve learned to be independent and really do things for myself. Most people underestimate the importance of knowing how to do things for yourself until they get to live by themselves. Long story short, I have never known the importance of owning a broom until I lived by myself and had to see to it that my place is clean. Being alone in this cold world is an eye-opener. It only has this one simple rule; “Do things for yourself or they shall remain undone”. This is one of the biggest challenges ever, because at this point you learn to sacrifice and to compromise on a lot of things. You also learn that you cannot compare your life to other people, because your circumstances are very different and you cannot always have everything you want at that time convenient only for you.
But nevertheless it is a very rewarding journey, because once you learn the ropes, everything else just automatically falls into place. And one thing that is greater than achieving something is the satisfaction of knowing that you have done it on your own. In life I have learned that you start with laying a single brick, and if you work really hard, before you know it, you will have a full house. It is all about one step at a time, one day at a time.
I have decided to write again. I have decided to share my story again. Because I have a dream to make a difference, to bring comfort to whoever may be going through a similar situation by letting they know that they’re not alone.
I have finally acknowledged my writing as a gift, as the only thing that that I’m good at. And another lesson life has taught me is that; “When there is nothing else to do, just do what you know and you will never go wrong”.
And if my writing can bring a smile to someone out there, even if it can be just one person, I’ll know that I have done my job because the world has added one more smiley face because of me.
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