Time Flies On Your Day Off

I work at retail, so my average day is “targets”, “targets”, and more “targets”. And oh, smelling like perfumes we can’t afford, putting on colgate smiles even when we actually want to punch a customer on the throat, and running like athletes selling clothes we can’t equally afford.
In retail, a person is expected in a day to make more money than he earns in a whole year, and if you think that is preposterous, wait until you see the staff dancing like Michael Jackson celebrating having sold goods worth R58 000 in a day and met their “targets”, and in the end earning about R2 100 in a whole damn month, what about meeting your personal targets?Bad-Tour-Billie-Jean-michael-jackson-13443788-800-1200
Anyway, this piece isn’t about how the rich gets richer and poor get poorer because their sweats and tears are responsible for the richer’s riches and only if they could employ that very same level of commitment towards attainment of their own personal goals. This piece is just about time, not in some deep philosophical way, but just about regular hours on my days off.

I may not be necessarily patriotic about reaching targets of R58 000 a day, R 400 000 in a single week and R 1 2400 000 in a month whilst being compensated around R 25 000 a year, but I still love my job. I love keeping busy, being around people to study human behavior, smiling at beautiful ladies and being of “service”, I work with about 90% women colleagues and 100% female customers, so what’s there not to love?

Loving my job as I do, I can’t help but feel time loves us just as much. Work hours are not regular hours; at work, you stand up, dust rakes, hang clothes, sweep the floor, open the door, assist about 80 customers and check time, and it’s only been about 15 minutes; the very same 15 minutes you lose as soon as you pull out a sit on your tea break.

And time on your day off isn’t from the same clock as a work day. Today I was off, the plan was to wake up early, do my house chores, write blog articles, read, spend some quality time with my girlfriend, go lvisit my friends, and listen to the ‘Think And Grow Rich’ audio book. But, I woke up, decided it was still too early so I went back to bed for a couple of minutes (and woke up three hours later), by then it was too late for house chores and so I called my girl over and in a blink she had left (after about five hours), so I just went for a haircut and the barber was extremely efficient (in about an whole hour), and so after that I couldn’t read, write, listen to my audio book or hang out with my boys, so I just went to buy a take away because it was too then late to cook, and surprisingly, all the shops were already closed.
And there goes my day off.

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Conversations With Lucy #04

ME: Today I want to talk about materialism.
LUCY: Okay, what about it?
ME: I really do not have much, but as soon as my circumstances change, I really want to own skyscrapers for the heck of it, wear Tom Ford suits and smell of Gucci perfumes. And I often worry that it makes me a shallow person.
LUCY: Why would it?
ME: (looks down) Because the society perceives materialistic people to be.
LUCY: (looks up) The society looks down on people who let their materialistic possessions define them.
ME: (rolling eyes) But, what does that even mean?
LUCY: It means that a Gucci perfume remains just that, a Gucci perfume. It doesn’t make you any better anyhow than the person with a much cheaper one, if any at all. The thing about materials is, they serve a purpose, to make life easier or luxurious whatsoever, and as long as you acquire them for that use only, you’re still on the right track I guess, but the moment you use them to feel superior and more entitled to attention and respect than other people, then you’re getting derailed.
ME: (smiling) So there is nothing wrong with being materialistic then?
LUCY: Yes, only if you can afford that lifestyle. The problem is the price most people often pay for it, they often acquire it at the expense of other people, and that is not right.
ME: So rich people are evil?
LUCY: Being evil or not has nothing to do with your financial status, it’s in your heart. The thing about evilness is it is just an ill thought, whether exercised or otherwise.
ME: So, rich people do not have a responsibility towards the poor?
LUCY: They do, in the every same way the poor have the same responsibility towards each other, most importantly, towards themselves. Help another person in any and every way you can when you can, but always remember, their insolvency can only be truly averted by them and no one else, not even the “rich” (air quotations).
ME: Thank you so much Lucy (rubbing hands in excitement), but I feel like we’re drifting away from the topic now. So let me ask this once again, there is anything wrong with wanting to be rich?
LUCY: No, as much as there is nothing wrong with not wanting to be rich as well.
ME: So, it doesn’t make one shallow then?
LUCY: No it doesn’t, as much as being covered in rags would not make the next man any “deeper” than you, or me for that matter.
ME: So, loving materialistic possessions is okay then?
LUCY: (smiles) As long as you still love people more.
ME: Damn, okay, this is getting “deep” (imitates Lucy’s famous air quotations)……….. (thinks for a moment) So tell me, does it really mean…………………………………

[TO BE CONTINUED…….]

I Just Wanna Be Rich

I once heard someone saying “If I never get rich, I have no idea what I’ll do with my life”, and I just thought to myself “Neither would I”.

I desperately want to be rich. I dream like a child, with no limitations, no calculations, no “common sense” whatsoever, and I just want what I want. I want money, lots of it, the finest cars, suits, shoes from Italy, and the best fragrances money can buy. Am I asking for too much?

I am not even that educated, nor overflowing with business ideas, if anything, I seriously suck at business. But all of that will not stop me from getting what I want, nothing will.

I just want everything I’ve never had, a house on the hills for all times I had nowhere to live, the finest cars for all the times I’ve walked, Singapore lobster for all the times I slept hungry, Tom Ford and Versace for all the times I looked like a 70’s pornstar at church, hallelujah, and a girl like Marylyn Monroe for all the nights I slept alone.

I’ve been told “it’s lonely at the top”. Well, guess what, I’ve been lonely at the bottom as well.

One day I will sit on my expensive leather couch, sip on the finest champagne in nothing but my silk underwear, read a book by Gayton McKenzie, remember this day and thank my self for my foolish determination, for if I had been any smarter, I would have figured it’s all impossible at some point and gave in.